Or, at least, I have this unbreakable tendency to try to say something polite/complimentary and then have it come out as insulting. O__o I shall give you two recent examples below:
Scenario #1: Boyfriend and I step into our local diner.
Hostess: "Hi! How are you?"
Us: "Great, thanks! How are you?"
Hostess: "Oh, doing fine, thanks."
Boyfriend: "Busy day?"
Hostess: "No, not really."
Me: "Oh, that's good."
*awkward silence*
What I meant: Oh, that's good, because I'm glad that you didn't have a stressful day dealing with huge crowds of people.
What it sounds like: Oh, that's good, cuz your restaurant's gonna TANK.
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Scenario #2: Twitter. I am watching a video of Harry Shum Jr.'s mad dancing skills (you know, that Glee guy), and a Conan the Barbarian trailer pops up.
What I wanted to say on Twitter: You know, even though buff guys like Conan the Barbarian are supposed to be the ones I'm attracted to, I still like lean guys like Harry Shum Jr., because they are also handsome and attractive and appealing even though they do not have big bulging muscles. Yay for those of us who are not alpha perfect!
What I actually say on Twitter:
Muscles are so overrated.
*suddenly remembers that there are some muscular, friendly ppl on her followers list*
I mean, abdominal muscles are nice. But I still like lean+mean over muscular guys.
I mean, some muscle is good. But I mean muscular like, The Rock. Not hot.
*remembers The Rock is actually a nice person in interviews*
I mean, @redcrest is right, I probably like lean guys because I like bishonen boys in anime.
*@redcrest comes to my aid, gently suggesting that muscular guys are also great, they are the evolutionary instinct*
I mean, my preference for lean guys over muscular guys gives me a distinct evolutionary disadvantage.
I mean, not that muscular guys are unattractive. I just like lean guys better.
I mean, not that lean guys are evolutionary disadvantages.
*awkward silence*
Ok, now that I have thoroughly insulted both muscular and lean guys, I'm going to shut up now and go back into my box.
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Hmm........I really need to work on my delivery.....
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Listening to: Best Love Song - T-Pain
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Reading: The Demon's Surrender - Sarah Rees Brennan
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Playing: New Super Mario Bros
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Eating: Korean food
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Drinking: Always agua
And sometimes when you try to explain things after the awkward silence, people think that you're saying it just to make them feel better when you actually meant the first sentence sincerely.
I like lean guys better, too. Not that I have anything against muscular guys.
That, and anything I say somehow becomes an Innuendo. You'd think i was shakespeare!
things never go according to plan...sometimes i think my brain and my mouth hate each other.
I seem really nice at first and then I just seem derpy/slow because sometimes I am ;~;
DOESN'T MEAN I'M NOT COOL RIGHT GUYS???
Guys? ;~;
I have taking to letting people know if I'm going to be around them a lot (like with coworkers for example) that if I ever say anything that could be construed as an insult or comes across like I'm being a bitch to assume I just stuck my foot in my mouth and that there was no malice intended.
It can be even worse in online communication like this because tone can't really be properly conveyed and I've had people assume I was being a jerk or being condecending because of how I worded things. If I try to be blunt people think I'm a jerk. if I try to cover my ass and be polite and make it clear I'm not trying to be a jerk people think I'm being condecending. *sigh*.
Try not to worry too much about it. I think often people don't take too much from it.
i'm sure that doesn't help but I do understand what you mean.
You're overworrying, mree!
The second situation is actually pretty hilarious and I think your final comment successfully diffused the situation XD haha